Tuesday, June 29, 2010

Life, Out of the Box

You know God is stretching you when things you don't expect start piling up and up and up.
When it rains it pours... To everything there is a season...

Well six months (I believe to the day) of losing one dog, we have lost another (and we only had two to begin with!). Samson had to find a new home today. There have been issues over him leaving our backyard, and I'm not too thrilled about the puncture marks in our leather sofa from his claws, but we had the last straw yesterday and he had to go. It had been coming, but we have had so much changing in our lives lately and Mr. M's need for stability.... God knows. God sees. God is in control. I just need to keep trusting. As I was driving to pick up Mr. Z from a day camp, a song came on the radio, I didn't "Shazam" it with my iphone so I don't know the title, but the artist sang of God being in control and knowing and caring. Just what I needed to hear at just the right moment. It's amazing that days before when the station's music manager was selecting songs and play order God was directing him and I would be in the van at exactly the right time to hear exactly what I need in order to not have a total breakdown over the dog!

I am looking forward to the flowers that this season of storms is going to produce. I pray that Mr. Incredible's travel will yield fruit and not be wasted. I pray that God's provision for our family is sustaining and His hand of protection spread far. I pray that the kids aren't scarred for life after all this dog drama.

The storms in life produce the rainbows!!!!

Thursday, June 17, 2010

Giving It Up

I have worked for a couple hours each day this week sorting through my procrastination piles- clothes, paperwork, stuff, etc. Last night while I waited for Mr. Incredible to get home I tackled the computer counter. It's amazing there really still is a white counter under all that paperwork and those items of "what does this belong to?". I would love to say that I got all the paperwork sorted and put up and, and, and... Nope it's now on the bench by the backdoor, but I did work on sorting! I even threw away some!!!!

I think Mr. Incredible's "we may need it someday" philosophy has had an effect on me. I have two file drawers filled with Mr. Z's and Mr. J's early artwork and other things they have done over the years. As a homeschooler you want to keep some things to show proof of what you have done, but when is enough enough?!

I want my kids to know how much I cherish them and that is of course reflected in all the little do da's they create and I keep, right? Wrong! I have become a slave to Sunday School papers and crafts, school projects, that "I made this for you", "this is their first ___", etc.!!! My children aren't going to think that I'm a great mom because I saved every memento from their childhood if I can't have the decency to look them in the eye when they are asking me something. I can't make myself a perfect mom by scrapbooking the right way with the "right" things.

The last four days have made me take stock that I still want to be the perfect mom. I sadly thought that I was over this, but the piles of recital programs, AWANA do da's, certificate of completion of the summer reading with attached lists of what they've read have made me see that I want to at least somehow make my crazy and chaotic life appear normal and perfect even if it is only in a scrapbook or some keepsake box. But I am only bringing chaos and more things to clean when these items turn into piles and the piles cause guilt and the guilt makes me feel like I am a failure.

God never gives us more than we can bear, but what burdens (or activities) have you brought on yourself and are saying that God gave you? I once heard this story of a woman who was at the bottom of a hill with an empty wheelbarrow. She prayed that God would give her a purpose, so God told her to pick up the rock next to the wheelbarrow and take it up to the top of the hill. So she picked up the rock and started up the hill. She hadn't gone very far when she saw another rock and thought, "I'll take this one up too". As she kept going up the mountain she kept picking up rocks, small ones and big ones, and her load kept getting heavier and heavier. Straining with each step as she pushed her heavy laiden load ehe called out to God to help her to make it to the top of the hill. She told God that He had given her to much of a load. God in his infinite wisdom responded, "I only gave you one rock, you took the rest on yourself".

Ahh, that I can give up all the rocks that I've piled on. God doesn't want perfection from me (or anyone). He knew I(we) couldn't be perfect and that is why He sent His son to die for my(our) imperfections. God only wants me to be more like HIM- loving, patient, gentle, kind, self-less, giving... That's probably a big enough rock right there ;)

Wednesday, June 16, 2010

Ah, Summer!

Tomorrow is the conclusion of two weeks of VBS. Last week our church had it's VBS week. They did a High Seas program and I worked in the Galley preparing snacks, yum! I had to work in order for all our kids to go. Elizabeth's teachers loved her of course.
This week a very close to home church is having their VBS and they take the oldest four without me having to work!!!! I have been able to get so much done! Unfortunately they don't have it on Friday... I have been able to tackle the procrastination piles that have piled up since we adopted Elizabeth while the boys have been there. Just the computer counter and the guest bedroom left...um, don't think that all that can happen tomorrow, but we'll see!
Mr. Incredible left the house at 4:30 this morning for a day in Denver and will be home sometime after midnight tonight- what a day for him! We all missed seeing him this morning and I know bedtime is going to be another stressor.
People comment to me how much Elizabeth is changing and growing. I can remember what she was like when we got her, and she isn't anything like that now, usually. But I just don't "see" the monthly progress that ECI is saying. I guess because it just happens so gradually, but at least it is happening!
I've done something a little crazy twice now- gone and looked at houses for sale!!!! I don't want to move, but if we could get a bigger house with a bigger yard.... The realtor is so sweet, she sold us this house now almost eight years ago. My times have changed- biggest thing we only had two kids then! Either I was having some sort of moment or God is working on me, because when she asked how many kids we had I said, "Five, four boys and two girls." I didn't say this just once, but several times! I knew I was saying it wrong, but couldn't for the life of me say it "right"! I had mentioned to Mr. I several times that if we wanted to adopt again maybe we should start again, but he's put me off and I haven't really felt God calling us to a certain country or anything. Then day before yesterday was one of "those" days and I said we were done as far as I was concerned. So I couldn't believe when less than 24 hours later it really seemed like God was controlling my tongue and I was talking about another girl!!! Wait and see for the Lord is good, His mercy endures forever.
Last week we began a Financial Peace class, not that we have financial chaos, but it's at a really cool place for the kids to play and they play FREE so the course is just a bonus! We are most interested in college and retirement, but after the houses I looked at yesterday, if we want anything that remotely meets our criteria and space needs we will have to shell out many pretty pennies. I saw what not so many pretty pennies and cramped space buys yesterday- YIKES!!! We could always build on our land, but wanting to be debt free and building a new house don't go hand in hand. Hmmm, more of that waiting...
But God continues to be faithful. Mr. J's busted head didn't require a visit to ER or the doctor or stitches. Mr. M hasn't thrown any dog poop into the pool this summer. Found out that Mr. M has been getting gluten on Sundays at church for the last month- that explains A LOT. Mr. Z gets to participate in a play camp. Elizabeth doesn't drag her foot quite so much- I look like an idiot high stepping next to my two year old, but pride went out the window three kids ago :) Just to find a helper, the right helper. Anybody, anybody???!!!!

Tuesday, June 8, 2010

Health Update

Well I apparently suffered a ruptured hemoragic ovarian cyst. Without doing a laproscopic scope -it's a probably, but a fairly high probably given my symptoms and their presentation and then abatement. I got to spend all day in ER then have an overnight stay up in postpartum. That was a weird experience - I had always had a baby before when I was on that floor. My symptoms had been EXTREME pain followed by a "pop", abdominal tenderness and swelling. It was the last two after the pain and the pop that made me worried. Apparently if I had been male and with those symptoms I would have gone straight to surgery. The first thoughts were appendicitis, diverticulitis, and then finally "female trouble". Hopefully, I won't have to EVER repeat that experience again.
Lest our life become boring Mr. J gave himself a 5mm gash on the top of his head Sunday night. The blood was gushing and my first thought was another trip to ER!!!! But fortunately he got a goose egg, his eyes were responsive, he wasn't dizzy, didn't get a headache and the gash was small enough to not require stitches. Maybe that incident might curb his jumping up on the counter to get something out of the cabinet.
Today I woke up feeling the best I had in at least a week if not two and that's on five hours sleep and no coffee in days!
We have VBS this week and after how I felt yesterday I wasn't sure how the week was going to go. Of course Elizabeth's teachers think she's precious. I have to agree.

Friday, June 4, 2010

You'll never believe it

I awoke EARLY this morning in extreme pain and after spending all day in ER have earned the privelidge to spend the night. Hope to go home in the am. NOT the way I planned on spending my day! But the kids are being well cared for and God remains faithful. :)

Wednesday, June 2, 2010

Coming and Goings

I have been sooooo busy lately that I haven't had time to post! Imagine that?!
We just got back from a trip to my parents. It was nice to sleep in and have someone to watch the kids. It was great to stay up after the kids had gone to bed and play Upwords or Yuker. But most of all it was great just to be away. Away from all the busyness that consumes my days lately.

We met with our school district and Elizabeth will continue with her language development services this summer and in the fall begin speech therapy twice a week in addition to the language. So with Mr. M's appointments and Elizabeth's we will have 8 weekly appointments not including any lessons, etc. - 5 at home and 3 away. I am truly trying to be thankful that my kids are getting needed help, but the thought of trying to fit everything in is overwhelming. I had the insane thought of adding to our schedule our local homeschooling group's learning classes that meet once a week during the school year, actually a little less, however sign ups closed early because of being full. We would have lost a whole day of being able to do school and appointments, due to class and mommy recovery- at least it was that way a couple of years ago when we did them. I could try to get on the waiting list, hmmmmm.

Mr. Incredible was just promoted to a managing position at his place of employment. He has been with the company for over 13 years. Hard to believe so much time has gone by. I am looking forward to possibly less travel for him. That would be NICE.

Our summer session of schooling is getting off to a slow start. There's some things that I am hoping to focus on this summer. I hope and pray it happens. Give us a leaping jump on next year or maybe it's ending this year with a bang. :)

Our helper has found a job for the fall, so if you know us personally and know of a young lady (over 18, State requirement) that would like to work in our home with our family for 23 hours a week, PLEASE email me or leave a comment!

I would love to have some wonderfully encouraging words, but alas I am at one of those points of hour by hour and minute by minute praying for strength and wisdom from the Almighty. I know He gives wisdom to those lacking (Prov. 2:6)and strength to the weary (Is. 40:29)and He has a season for everything (Ecc. 3:1). May I be willing to listen.